Top 40 Marriage Quotations

August 20, 2008

  • “Is it better for a woman to marry a man who loves her than a man she loves. “– Anonymous

  • “All marriages are happy. It’s living together afterwards that is difficult. “– Anonymous

  • “Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other fellow has, you wish you had ordered that.”– Anonymous

  • “It’s not as great a day for the bride as she thinks. She’s not marrying the best man. “– Anonymous

  • “Marriage is a romance in which the hero dies in the first chapter. “– Anonymous

  • “Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success.”– Jim Backus

  • “Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner. “– Amy Bloom

  • “Marriage has no guarantees. If that’s what you’re looking for, go live with a car battery.”– Erma Bombeck

  • “I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell this to my children they just about throw up. “– Barbara Bush

  • “All tragedies are finished by a death, all comedies by a marriage.”– Lord Byron

  • “If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam. “– Johnny Carson

  • “If you are afraid of loneliness, don’t marry. “– Chekhov

  • “Marriage is an adventure, like going to war. “– G. K. Chesterton

  • “The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. “– S. T. Coleridge

  • “I never married because I have three pets at home that answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog that growls every morning, a parrot that swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night. “– Marie Corelli

  • “I’d marry again if I found a man who had 15 million and would sign over half of it to me before the marriage and guarantee he’d be dead within a year. “– Bette Davis

  • “Marriage is a lottery in which men stake their liberty and women their happiness. “– Madame de Rieux

  • “Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.”– Phyllis Diller

  • “There’s only one way to have a happy marriage and as soon as I learn what it is I’ll get married again.”– Clint Eastwood

  • “Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invaribly they are both disappointed.”– Albert Einstein

  • “A man’s wife has more power over him than the state has.”– Ralph Waldo Emerson

  • “Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards. “– Benjamin Franklin

  • “A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished. “– Zsa Zsa Gabor

  • “I’m an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house. “– Zsa Zsa Gabor

  • “I don’t think I’ll get married again. I’ll just find a woman I don’t like and give her a house. “– Lewis Grizzard

  • “If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married. “– Katharine Hepburn

  • “Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else in the house. “– Jean Kerr

  • “I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. “– Groucho Marx

  • “Politics doesn’t make strange bedfellows, marriage does. “– Groucho Marx

  • “Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe. “– Jackie Mason

  • “Marriage is three parts love and seven parts forgiveness of sins. “– Langdon Mitchell

  • “A good marriage is at least 80 percent good luck in finding the right person at the right time. The rest is trust. “– Nanette Newman

  • “When marrying, one should ask oneself this question: Do you believe that you will be able to converse well with this woman into your old age? “– Friedrich Nietzsche

  • “Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said; after marriage, he’ll fall asleep before you finish saying it. “– Helen Roland

  • “By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.”– Socrates

  • “Some of us are becoming the men we wanted to marry. “– Gloria Steinem

  • “I’ve yet to be on a campus where most women weren’t worrying about some aspect of combining marriage, children, and a career. I’ve yet to find one where many men were worrying about the same thing. “– Gloria Steinem

  • “Loves seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of all growths. No man or woman really knows what perfect love is until they have been married a quarter of a century. “– Mark Twain

  • “Marriage is a great institution, but I’m not ready for an institution. “– Mae West

  • “Men marry because they are tired; women because they are curious. Both are disappointed.”– Oscar Wilde

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